We’ve all been there – you’re hungry, the restaurant looks busy, and you just want to get seated as quickly as possible. But before you decide to skip the host stand or start demanding that empty table by the window, you might want to think twice. Restaurant hosts deal with hundreds of customers daily, managing reservations, seating charts, and the flow of the entire restaurant. And trust me, there are certain customer behaviors that make their already stressful job so much worse. Want to avoid being “that customer” next time you eat out? Here’s what those clipboard-wielding gatekeepers wish you would stop doing.
Seating yourself without waiting to be seated
You walk into a restaurant, spot an empty table, and think, “Perfect! I’ll just sit there.” Stop right there. This is probably the number one behavior that drives hosts crazy. When you seat yourself, you mess up their entire system. That empty table might be reserved for someone else, or it might be in a server’s section that’s already overwhelmed with too many tables. The host has a master plan for how to distribute customers evenly throughout the restaurant to ensure everyone gets good service.
When you bypass the host stand and choose your own seat, you’re essentially throwing a wrench into the restaurant’s carefully orchestrated seating plan. It can leave some servers with too many tables while others stand around with nothing to do. It also creates confusion about who should be serving your table. Even if the restaurant seems empty, always wait to be seated by the host. They’re not making you wait at the front just for fun – they’re trying to keep the restaurant running smoothly for everyone’s benefit.
Showing up with more people than your reservation
You made a reservation for four, but two friends decided to join at the last minute, and now you’re a party of six. No big deal, right? Actually, it’s a huge deal for the restaurant host. Restaurants plan their seating arrangements based on the reservations they have, and when you show up with extra people, it throws everything off. That table for four they had ready for you won’t fit six people, and they might not have a larger table available right away. This means the host now has to scramble to find a solution while you and other waiting customers grow impatient.
Adding even one or two extra people to your party can create significant challenges for the host and the kitchen. The restaurant might not have enough chairs or table space, and the kitchen has prepared for a certain number of diners that evening. Always call ahead if your party size changes – even if it’s just an hour before your reservation. According to restaurant workers, this common courtesy goes a long way in helping them prepare for your arrival and ensures a smoother experience for everyone involved, including you and your dining companions.
Not acknowledging the host when you arrive
You walk into a restaurant and immediately start looking for an open table or asking about your reservation without even saying hello to the host. This might seem minor, but it’s actually really off-putting to the person whose job it is to make your dining experience pleasant. Restaurant hosts are people too, and basic courtesy goes a long way. When you enter a restaurant and bypass a simple greeting in favor of demands or questions, you’re essentially treating the host like a robot rather than a human being providing you with a service.
A simple “Hi, how are you?” before launching into your request can completely change the tone of the interaction. Hosts notice when customers treat them like actual people, and they’re more likely to go the extra mile for polite guests. Many hosts report that one of their biggest pet peeves is customers who don’t offer a greeting. Remember, the host is often your first impression of a restaurant, and they’re also forming their first impression of you – make it a good one by showing basic human courtesy.
Complaining about the wait for a table
Friday night, 7 PM, no reservation, and you’re upset about having to wait 45 minutes for a table? This is another top complaint from restaurant hosts. When you walk into a busy restaurant without a reservation and then get annoyed about the wait time, you’re essentially blaming the host for your lack of planning. Hosts don’t create wait times to annoy you – they’re simply managing the reality of how many tables are available and how many people want them. Getting frustrated with the host won’t make tables turn over any faster.
If you show up during peak dining hours without a reservation, be prepared to wait or consider dining at a less busy time. And if the host gives you a wait time of 45 minutes, don’t come back after 20 minutes asking if your table is ready. According to restaurant staff, this constant checking-in doesn’t speed up the process – it just adds more pressure to an already stressful situation. The host isn’t purposely making you wait; they’re trying to be fair to all customers while keeping the restaurant running efficiently. If waiting isn’t your thing, call ahead or use reservation apps to secure your table in advance.
Demanding a different table after being seated
The host has seated you at a perfectly fine table, but you immediately decide you want to sit somewhere else – maybe by the window or in a quieter corner. While it’s reasonable to have preferences, demanding to switch tables after being seated creates a domino effect of problems for the restaurant staff. When a host assigns you a table, it’s not random. They’ve considered the current workload of servers, kitchen timing, reservations, and the overall flow of the restaurant. Your table change request can disrupt all of this careful planning.
If you have specific seating preferences, the best approach is to mention them when making your reservation or when first speaking with the host upon arrival. Most hosts will try to accommodate reasonable requests when given advance notice. However, once you’re seated, switching tables without permission can confuse servers about who’s responsible for your table and may even result in slower service for you. If you absolutely must change tables after being seated, explain your reason politely and understand if the host says it’s not possible – there might be factors at play that aren’t immediately obvious to you as a customer.
Not responding when your table is ready
The host has taken your name, given you a wait time, and you’ve decided to wait at the bar or step outside. When they finally call your name to let you know your table is ready, you’re nowhere to be found or you take your sweet time finishing your drink. Meanwhile, your table sits empty, and other hungry customers continue to wait. This scenario is incredibly frustrating for hosts who are trying to seat as many people as efficiently as possible. When you don’t promptly respond to your table call, you’re essentially holding up the entire restaurant operation.
Most restaurants have a policy that if you don’t respond within a certain timeframe (often 5-10 minutes), they’ll give your table to the next waiting party. This isn’t to be mean – it’s because restaurants operate on tight margins and can’t afford to have tables sitting empty. If you need to step away while waiting, inform the host and make sure you can hear when they call your name. Better yet, many restaurants now offer text notifications when your table is ready. When you receive that message, wrap up what you’re doing and head to the host stand promptly. Your consideration helps the restaurant run smoothly and gets other waiting customers to their tables faster too.
Claiming to know the owner for special treatment
“Do you know who I am? I’m friends with the owner.” If you’ve ever said this to a restaurant host, you’ve instantly become that customer – the one they’ll laugh about in the break room later. Name-dropping the owner to get special treatment is not only ineffective but also incredibly annoying to hosts who hear this claim multiple times every shift. Sure, some people actually do know the owner, but real friends of the owner typically don’t need to announce it – the staff already knows who they are, or the owner has called ahead to arrange special treatment.
Even if you are acquainted with the owner, that doesn’t mean the laws of physics can be broken to create a table during a fully booked Saturday night. Restaurant hosts are trained to handle these situations diplomatically, but inside they’re rolling their eyes. According to restaurant staff, these types of customers often expect to skip the line, get the best table, or receive free items – all while the host tries to maintain fairness for other waiting customers. If you genuinely know the owner and they’ve promised you special treatment, have them make arrangements beforehand rather than putting the host in an awkward position.
Arriving right before closing time
It’s 9:55 PM, and the restaurant closes at 10:00 PM. You figure you can still squeeze in a quick dinner, so you walk in and ask to be seated. While technically the restaurant is still open, this behavior is universally frustrating for restaurant staff, including hosts. When you arrive minutes before closing time, you’re extending everyone’s workday – the host, servers, cooks, and dishwashers all have to stay well past their scheduled end time to serve you. Many restaurant workers are hourly employees who may have already been on their feet for 8+ hours.
Restaurant closing times indicate when they stop seating new customers, not when the staff goes home. After the last customer leaves, employees still have to clean, restock, and prepare for the next day – often an hour or more of work. While most restaurants will accommodate you if you arrive 5-10 minutes before closing, it’s considered much more respectful to arrive at least 30 minutes before closing time. According to service industry workers, this common courtesy is greatly appreciated and allows staff to complete their closing duties without having to stay extremely late. If you must eat very late, consider restaurants with extended hours or places that specialize in late-night dining.
Next time you’re at a restaurant, remember that hosts are the gatekeepers who can make or break your dining experience. A little patience and respect goes a long way – wait to be seated, stick to your reservation details, acknowledge the host as a person, and understand that some things are beyond their control. Your meal will likely be more enjoyable when you start with positive interactions, and you’ll be doing your part to make the restaurant experience better for everyone – including yourself!
